discomfort > comfort

aka: vocal wisdom from yoga instructor, Bernie Clark

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“Comfort comes at the expense of health.”

This quote came into my world from the yoga instructor, Bernie Clark, & I have had it on repeat in my mind while doing the following activities:

• This past weekend, I took a road trip to Canada that wasn’t planned prior to that same week. I came home more energized than I left even with driving 30+ hours over five days.

• This past month, I supported a client in performing for a college reunion & I only met them in July. I don’t know if I will see this client again, but our time together was some of the most inspiring work I’ve done this year.

• This past year, I have committed myself to writing a book & I have no connections in the publishing industry. I am writing this book because it needs to be written & I know I am the person that can do it, I will figure out the rest as I go.

For a previous version of Ally, all of these would have been uncomfortable situations to be avoided at all costs. They weren’t all planned out in advance, they didn’t have certainty attached to them, & they weren’t the conventional choice. But today’s version of Ally is excited by the discomfort of what’s unknown because it allows me to be open to what’s possible. And, what happens next doesn’t have to be what’s expected, maybe it’s even better!

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Discomfort…at first

This got me thinking about comfort v. discomfort in learning how to sing. As a voice teacher, so much of what I ask students to try in lessons or workshops is uncomfortable…at first. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable because it’s new. Like when a student comes to lessons to sing exclusively pop & commercial music, but I have them try out musical theatre or classical songs to stretch their skills. Or, it’s uncomfortable because a concept is different from how a student usually experiences it. This often happens with young students when they realize they have a strong & capable high voice that has typically felt light & breathy. Perhaps it’s uncomfortable because it’s the opposite of what they have been told by a different teacher. This almost always happens with the concept of posture. Posture discussions usually encourage rigidity & static body posture versus body work experiences which inspire flowing & intuitive movement that supports singing.

Every time a student experiences this period of discomfort they are actively strengthening their voice, body & mindset as it relates to singing. I don’t know anything healthier than that voice wise. Over time these uncomfortable skills can start to become comfortable, which means the student is mastering the concept & it’s becoming part of how they sing without having to think about it. This is the goal of singing- freedom & ease. When students become comfortable in their voice work, it’s a sign that it’s time to layer on a new vocal technique, try out a new singing genre, or go deeper into song analysis, acting, or performance skills. It is constant process of starting in discomfort, working through the messy middle, to reach comfort & doing it all over again endlessly.

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“Teach your students how to fly their own plane or practice their own practice.”

This is another quote morsel from the yoga instructor, Bernie Clark, & I think it beautifully connects to the previous quote. Once a student has been working on their voice for a while & probably with a teacher, they will reach a point of discomfort where they can practice efficiently on their own & want to begin having input in their lesson content. This is totally normal & honestly the goal of lessons, too. At some point, students shouldn’t rely solely on their teacher to steer their vocal growth. Rather teachers should be giving students tools that allow their voices fly independent of their work together. It is a HUGE leap for a student to take ownership over their voice, lessons, & practice. Yet, it is a necessary transfer of power from teacher directed to student led lessons. When students start to find comfort in guiding their lesson work, this is my signal as a teacher that our sessions begin to move from a lesson structure to a coaching setting. Coaching sessions look like the teacher listening more than steering & the student guiding & collaborating more than observing. Again this can be jarring for students that are used to a teacher being “the sage on the stage” & cause discomfort. But, in my experience, this initial discomfort is more than worth it for the outcomes of student empowerment & vocal confidence. More dialogue on the difference between lessons & coaching can be found HERE.

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So…can we ever really be comfortable?

Honestly, I would say no. If you’re not growing, you’re dying. Comfort is a plateau state, it is stasis, it is settling for what is & has been. Discomfort is a growth state, it is dynamic, it inspires us to take action. Fully present singing is in the moment & responding to what is happening right now. It is trusting you have prepared & planned as much as you can PRIOR to that moment so you can let the voice & your performance be what it is going to be without trying to control or manipulate the outcome. This is complete discomfort, but also total vocal freedom once your mind accepts that you are going to be safe even if you don’t know what the final product will be. So much of our vocal tension & mental stress comes from trying to puppeteer our voices rather than trusting they know what they are doing. Trust yourself, you can do more than you know & you can sing better than you probably give yourself credit for. And when you doubt it, blast “HOT TO GO!” by Chappell Roan & sing along to give yourself the pep talk you need: “H-O-T-T-O-G-O! My voice is hot to go!”

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